Turning 25.
One quarter of a century down, three to go!
It’s the 11th hour of my 24th year on planet Earth. And what a year it’s been. I entered my third year of living in Sydney, got my first adult job, moved apartments twice, and ran another half-marathon (I know, I know, I said never again, but alas). I had my ups and downs, which I’ve understood is simply the rollercoaster called life.
We have just entered the Jewish month of Av. This is one of the hardest times for the Jewish people as we commemorate many tragedies, such as the destruction of not one, but two temples. We acknowledge the pain of the past. However, we then learn that the destruction of one thing can lead to the creation of something even greater. We learn that while it may seem impossible in the moment, we can see the positive through tragedy. Holding the grief simultaneously, of course. We must go through the fog of life even when we can’t see what is ahead.
That’s a bit of how I feel right now. My quarter-life crisis has been creeping up behind me, finally uttering “boo,” just loud enough for me to feel the shivers down my back and jump a little. I’d be lying if I wasn’t scared thinking about my future. With so many opportunities in front of me, how do I know what is best for me? How can I find my purpose in life? I want to mean something, do something, be something. Be someone.
I am channeling the power of Av. I am holding my fears, frustrations, and fatigue while I lean into the beautiful blessings that fill my life. I am allowing myself to be celebrated and appreciated. I am letting the love in, something I have never been very good at. It’s not being selfish, it’s not something you should feel guilty about, I remind myself. And I am making my way through the fog; putting one foot in front of the other, taking a few deep breaths, and maybe holding on a bit tighter to the hand that reaches for mine.
I am signing off as the clock strikes midnight. The next time you'll hear from me, I will be 25 years old.
Mom and Dad - can you believe it?
Happy and healthy birthday! I wish I’d been as wise and thoughtful and articulate as you are when I was 25! Have a great celebration ❤️
Beautifully written, Emma and so well articulated. You are wise beyond your 25 years. Holding several things simultaneously is never easy, but you are doing it all so well. For your birthday, we send love, respect, honor, and so much awe in how you are living your life. Keep on, keeping on, babe!